Gary Roberts can dunk a basketball with his feet.
Gary Roberts is so tall, he did a backflip and kicked Jesus in the mouth.
These are some of the Pensblog-inspired Gary Roberts Facts that make up half of the legend (okay, I made that second one up myself).
The other part of his legend includes his playoff performances, especially against Ottawa. All legends need substance, right?
This may seem a little far fetched right now, but I see Ryan Malone at the onset of his own Roberts-like career. I'm using no stats, merely my own opinion. I'm too lazy and bogged down with actual work to look up stats right now.
Watching Malone tirelessly work the top of the crease this postseason, I can't help but notice how much he plays like a younger Gary Roberts. Roberts immediately impacted the Pens with his presence around the net when he was acquired last season. Pittsburgh fans appreciated that on a level unrecognized before #10 came to town. Throughout this playoff run, Malone has matured into the type of crease-invading player that alters the course of the postseason. And he's conveniently doing it to pick up the slack with Gary out of the lineup.
Malone helped his boyhood team reach the final for the first time since '92 with two goals and an assist in the series-clinching game 5 win over the Flyers. Should the Pens win the Cup this season, Malone's contributions to help get the team this far would be seen as inspirational.
Roberts won a Cup early in his career, which is one of the reasons why his name invokes so many unique images. Would Roberts-facts Facebook pages exist if he was just another Cup-less player?
So if the Pens win the Cup, will Malone be that gritty, physical, garbage-goal scoring vet 10 years down the road? Will he get his own, Ryan Malone facts? He's physical (fought Hatcher), can score in the crease, knows how to check...and now has a chance to win a Cup.
Roberts-esque, if you ask me.
And too bad for us that he's going to be an unrestricted free agent.